Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Chainsaw Haiku Contest

Yes, I am wearing a tiara.

There's a storm coming my way and it's a doozy. Anyone who knows me has heard me say, "I'll take snow over ice any day." And I would. Because I live in the woods, down a really long driveway and when there's an ice storm, trees fall, power goes off and it's creepy as all get out. Last time we had no power for 8 days.

So, considering it's been a while since I had my chainsaw out, it was sure nice to start her up this morning. And I couldn't help but think about how much I love that chainsaw. So I wrote this haiku.
Sawdust is so nice
when it's made by my chainsaw
better than ice cream
Can you write a chainsaw haiku?
Syllable format is 5-7-5. You can enter more than once. Don't forget your email address.

DEADLINE: Tuesday, February 8th, 2011 11:59pm EST
PRIZE: A signed, personalized, Printz-stickered copy of Please Ignore Vera Dietz  
BONUS: If we get more than 60 entries we will pick TWO winners, so spread the word.

Happy writing and good luck!

122 comments:

Aimee Ferris said...

I love my chainsaw,

Vroogchagachag...except when

I have the hiccups.

Jessica Secret said...

Chainsaws are so cute.
I don't know why I think that.
Oh well. Guess I'm weird.

:D

shutupjessicasreading @ gmaildotcom

Tina Buchter said...

My chainsaw lover
You cut me through and through
I am in pieces.

Brian said...

Step step thud thud squirt
do the rumba with chainsaws
body parts will fly

Dawn said...

I love the big sound
A chainsaw makes in the calm
it growls, roars and purrs

Carly Reads said...

Love the tiara,
But I hope you also wore
Hearing protection.

(I am, after all, a future audiologist in training ...)

Tiffany Sears said...

Have a tough problem?
The chainsaw will see you through
Vroom Vroon; all is well.

Mindy fangedmom said...

snow not ice is nice
chainsaws scare me very much
chopping down trees fun

Kristen Albert/Grace Gallows said...

One more slicing game
the saw filling me with pain
now i fall and die.

Mindy fangedmom said...

I had to share this one that I posted on facebook:

Do you think u can
haiku a chainsaw contest
oh what fun this is

Geneagrapher said...

I saw the chainsaw
saw the chain and with my eye
would see it saw wood

lorylory said...

"Haiku chainsaw, dusty dog,"
Plied the girl who iged Vera.
"I'll send you a book!"

Anonymous said...

Chainsaws make me smile
Shook above the head of a
Dancing Leather Face

detailsforyou(AT) yahoo (DOT) com

Em said...

Hey! Backyard Weed Tree!
You best stop making babies
or meet the chainsaw!

Holly said...

Chainsaw, brat-brat, rend/
This fallen pine -- bark, sap – to/
sawdust and exhaust.

Beth S. said...

Don't chainsaw my book!
A.S. King signed it for me.
Vera's story can't die.

Mike Jung said...

O sweet, sweet chainsaw
The gnashing howl of your voice
Tears me asunder

Glorious chainsaw
Harbinger of woody doom
Sing your choppy song

Chainsaw love, babies
It'll rip you right in half
Roar, crosscut mama!

Joanne Levy said...

Chainsaw, oh chainsaw
Throwing sawdust and debris
Get in the shower

Jenny (The Mimosa Stimulus) said...

cut through the thickness
of all of these vehicles
chainsawing traffic

Mary said...

No fan of chainsaws
I'd like to keep my fingers
Irreplaceable

I've already won a contest, so I don't want to be considered for the prize, just wanted to join in the fun!

Bret said...

Chuga chuga vrooommmm
Cutting, spinning, smoking, loud
Chainsaw would saw wood

Michael Mason said...

Chainsaws shriek and grind
Shavings on the floor gather
We clean them up!

chainsaw haiku #1

Book Addict said...

My saw's chain link blade
Cuts through wood incredibly well
Oh look, there are trees

Book Addict said...

I've already won a copy of Please Ignore Vera Dietz as well, so don't consider me for the contest, but I wanted to write a haiku anyway.

Book Addict said...

Another one:

A.S. King's chainsaw
Cuts up the icy downed trees
Frees her from the snow

Joanne Fritz said...

Monster chainsaw roars
Slicing through branches and vines
Spewing out sawdust


My friend the chainsaw
Cuts through every obstacle
Opening the world

Kulsuma said...

The power of a
chainsaw at your fingertips
cues evil laughter
-
the chainsaw splutters
to life only to cause death-
complete irony
-
endless row of teeth
biting the flesh underneath
mechanical smirk
-
the glint of metal
under the cold winter sky
my chainsaw is King
-
i can see clearly
now the trees are gone, blue skies
a sunshiney day.

(inspired by johnny nash)
-
k_anon[at]hotmail[dot]co[dot]uk

poppy880 said...

The chainsaw I used
Is such a good power tool.
The sun is now seen.

Keith said...

Dirty, Twisted Limbs
Caught by Husband With Chainsaw
Catch Their Sappy Death

Anonymous said...

Swarm of killer bees
Sounds like when I use my saw
Spinning blades are fun :)

hahahaha this was so much fun!
zoejohnson993@yahoo.com

Christina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Christina said...

chainsaws are handy
until you lose a finger
they need each other

sheppard[dot]christy[at]gmail.com

Sasha Switz said...

chainsaws are scary
I don't want my hand cut off
I will not use one

:)

Noelli Spanelli said...

chainsaw is music
to my ears, I'm just hoping
I don't lose a limb

when the storms blowing
only one sound comforts me
purr of my chainsaw

chainsaw, my chainsaw
there's nothing greater than you
chainsaw I love you

Chainsaw you are great
better than slinkies and flowers
chainsaw you are SWEET!

ur.bloody.valentine@hotmail.com

Beeky said...

Courtesy of ice:
Chainsaw-wielding A.S. King.
Frightening to behold.

Cece said...

I play the chainsaw
Louis drums the trashcan lids
No one likes our band


I won the last contest so please don’t consider mine as a real entry.
I just couldn’t resist a chainsaw haiku contest!

Cece

linda2060 said...

Ahhh! Wild chainsaw chase!
Trip and fall, try to escape.
Heaven here I come.

I like this! I love everyone else's haiku too.

linda2060 said...

Whoops forgot my email address: lindadao2060@yahoo.com

Ashley said...

Chainsaw how i love you
Your sweet sounds that ease my stress
I want to be you

You got it easy chainsaw
Your job is to cut through things
Chainsaw, can we switch places

Trees have been falling down
Falling faster and faster picking up speed
It's because of the chainsaw

The fast pace you go
The way you go through practically anything
You make things easier chainsaw

not really that good at these but i tried!
ashikans@ptd.net

Nastya-Belikova said...

Roaring Violently
Trees to fall and wood to burn
Chainsaws groan, job done.

author... said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
author... said...

What am I to do?
A chainsaw cut me in two
Might you have some glue?

And btw Cece's entry rocks!

wachobs@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Chainsaw with sharp blade
Rusted brown yet gleaming bright
No choice but to saw


h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Blade of chainsaw. Wow.
Oh so withered you are. Sigh.
What else but to saw.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Booklover-bookchicks said...

A horror movie,
With ice-cream and hot pizza
Make a girl happy!

morgynmjoubert(at)hotmail(dot)com

Maria said...

Chainsaw Haiku:

Blade of a chainsaw,
Covered in red. It is fun,
to rampage the streets.

Maria said...

Whoops! Didnt leave the e-mail.
maria.rodriguez289@gmail.com

Lucy said...

Dangerous chainsaw
Scattering wood chips
Sawdust everywhere

lucy_zhang_blue(at)yahoo(dot)com

Elizabeth Keyser said...

chainsaw where are you?
there's a tree that needs cutting,
chainsaw i need you!

lizzykeys22@gmail.com

Sarah said...

When brother was born
Grandpa gave him a chainsaw.
Have to ask for use.

true story...

Sarah said...

Rip, rip, rip I hear
It's like music to my ears.
Chainsaws bring me joy.

Melissa said...

Dead. They say, Chainsaw
Some may say he felt nothing.
She hopes different.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Chainsaw cuts apples
They tasted bitter but yum
They went smoothly down.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Talk to a chainsaw
What might he say, truth or lies?
Nothing but sharpness.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Melissa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Melissa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Melissa said...

Cut chainsaw in half
What may it's insides reveal
A heart maybe? NO.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Melissa said...

String hung from my sleeve
Gonna cut it with chainsaw
For Charlie, it stayed.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Take this chainsaw now!
Contains much power within
Heart races. What now?

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

My brain says noway
The chainsaw says go ahead
Now what? Decisions.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Love him, he breaks you.
This chainsaw cuts oh so deep.
Yet I still love him.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Sarah said...

He's like a chainsaw
Fierce, scary, super cool.
He's a real cutup.

Melissa said...

Thundering to life
Oh so powerful chainsaw
I wanna hold him...

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Charlie laughed, I cried.
Took a chainsaw to our tree.
Sorry my pickle...

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

What was that chainsaw?
Want thick wood beneath your blade?
Please don't beg, just ask!

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

neonbooker said...

Chainsaws make tons of racket
Haiku don't make sense
Refrigerator

Maroon Wombat said...

Chainsaws give me warmth
But I try not to lose limbs
Sharpness brings danger

maroonwombat@gmail.com

neonbooker said...

craaaank vroom vroom TIMBER!!!!
Oops I didn't mean to mom
don't you like skylights?

neonbooker said...

craaank vroom vroom OUCHY!!!
I cut off my favorite hand
I think I will die

Sam said...

Hard buzzing like bees
The carving of wild woodlands
Sweet melodies buzzzz

TRose said...

Lose a finger, ow
Shame on me, but lose a foot
Shame on my chainsaw

TRose said...

Screach, Scream, Whirl and Gnash
Oh how I want to buzz a long
But wood hurts my teeth

tsubasa_rose@earthlink.net

Sam said...

Old friend but now new
adventures, where we frolic
in wood chip flurries

tsubasa_rose@earthlink.net

Brooke said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Brooke said...

I've for years after
Looked at that maple tree stump
And thought: my chainsaw...

brooke_holland14@yahoo.com

Melissa said...

Texas chainsaw man
Massacred my family
There is just me left

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

He held a chainsaw
What he did I do not know
I blame his parents.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Melissa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Melissa said...

My heart is broken
Don't know how to feel right now.
I blame the chainsaw.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Charlie, I love you.
He chainsawed my heart instead.
I am left broken.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Time can only tell
My heart races at the thought
This chainsaw runs deep.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Could not fall asleep
Took a chainsaw to my bed
I cut it in half.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Saw Charlie today
He held a chainsaw up high
Too quickly it fell.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Veer, I am sorry
I am your pickle, eat me.
Don't chainsaw our tree.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

My arm is missing
Was it a chainsaw? They ask.
I do not answer.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

My jaw was broken
Got hit with back of chainsaw
I wish for better.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

KayleeAyanaHofstetter said...

It is an evil
tree so I intend to cut it
down with my chainsaw

KayleeAyanaHofstetter said...

My chainsaw loves me.
It loves me because I feed
it lots of good wood

KayleeAyanaHofstetter said...

What happened to your
arm! It's gushing huge amounts
of slick scarlet blood!

Your rite! My arm does
appear to be missing! I
thought I felt something!

I must have hit it
with my chainsaw whilst outside!
Were's the hospital!?!

KayleeAyanaHofstetter said...

I wish chainsaws were
not banned at school. I think that
would be super cool.

KayleeAyanaHofstetter said...

Haikus are silly
things that rarly include logic.
Chainsaws cut trees down.

Michelle said...

I was taught that haiku had to be pertaining to nature and it needs to have an element of surprise at the ending... so here goes!

The dull humming buzz
Out in the quiet forest.
I hear a sharp scream.

Michelle said...

Oops... forgot email;
clubkokoro@aol.com

Michelle said...

It's coat shines brightly,
Sharp teeth, quietly waiting
Hungry for a woody feast.

clubkokoro@aol.com

Michelle said...

Earthy aroma,
Shrill, sharp cries of pain and fear.
Music to my ears.

clubkokoro@aol.com

Dreanda said...

Chainsaw is roaring,
I just love to watch that blade,
Slicing through it all.

Hear that sound it makes,
as the metal hits the wood,
Squealing with such force.

Cutting with great ease,
As if the wood were butter,
Sawdust raining down.

dreanda.z@hotmail.com

Dreanda said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dreanda said...

Before you know it,
Your chainsaw has sliced right through,
Oh how glorious!

dreanda.z@hotmail.com

Dreanda said...

Very swift and clean,
my blade takes me to the end,
wood is in pieces.

dreanda.z@hotmail.com

Samantha said...

I love my chainsaw
As necessary as food
Never lets me down

hsiu_an@hotmail.com

Therese said...

Chainsaw, you are sad
Because I have not used you?
You are just too loud.

Therese said...

Chainsaw, you are sad
Because I have not used you?
You are just too loud.

lollipop1060@gmail.com

Abby said...

Chainsaws hum, they purr.
Making branches fall shiftly.
My eternal love.

Melissa said...

Was an accident
That is what he had told me
The chainsaw was quick.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

The book angered me
Made me cry, I chainsawed it
Just some torn bits left.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

My heart is racing
temperature is rising
chainsawing is fun.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Too many haiku
Charlie begs me to stop soon
He chainsaws my pen.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Chainsaw is broken
Our Master Oak still remains
All is good for now.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Melissa said...

Things so far are good
The Great Hunter is watchful
No chainsaws allowed.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com


I am having too much fun to stop...

Anonymous said...

Chainsaws are great help
in zombie apocolypse
no biting for them

Hanna said...

A peace in the wood
The calm birdsong lingering
Destroyed by chainsaw.

hszigeti@ptd.net

Melissa said...

Chainsaw oh chainsaw
Who provided me with warmth
Thank you for the wood.

h.g.v.o.s.s@gmail.com

Maggie said...

Was that thunder? or...
A chainsaw let loose once more?
Ah, you've lost your ears

Summer G said...

Things that make me glad
fluffy cats, crafts and chainsaws
will you be my friend?

Kris said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kris said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
m rehr said...

guess’s good as mine
what the words, colors were in
awe of Chainsaw Chuck

mnrehr11 @ gmail.com

Nastya-Belikova said...

I totally forgot my email address. . . my bad:( Sorry.

nastya.fanfiction (at) gmail (dot) com

Anonymous said...

Chainsaws are awful
Because they potentially
Could cause blood to spill

lifeisadance92@yahoo.com