Friday, June 12, 2009

Who's Coming to Dinner? (A Contest )

Some of you who know me know that I'm presently enjoying a week of fun with my mother-in-law, who is visiting from Ireland. Times like these, I love to get away from my office and cook great food. So, while I'm off marinading and crockpotting and sipping the cooking wine, here's a fun contest to win a signed copy of The Dust of 100 Dogs and some groovy booty. CHALLENGE: Write a story that is 100 words or less about a dinner with a dinner guest. ADDITIONAL RULES:
  1. The story MUST contain this sentence: "This was something we never expected."
  2. The story must include a mention of something to eat. (Either "cheeseburger" or "lightly sauteed breast of chicken with Gorgonzola and pear sauce" will do.)
DEADLINE: Monday, June 15th 23:59 EDT (That's one minute to midnight.) PRIZES: A signed copy of The Dust of 100 Dogs and a severed hand. (The book is real, the hand is not.) My daughter, who begged me for the other severed hand that I had, assures you that you will have hours of fun with this hand. Stuffing it into your cuff and shaking dinner guests' hands never gets old. Winners will be chosen by two tiara-topped synchronized swimmers and the rabbit who's been eating all my gladioli. Please leave your entry in the comments area, along with an email address. If you don't want to leave your email address, drop me a line at asking (at) as-king (dot) com, and give it to me there, please. Thanks! Good Luck!


Joanne Levy said...

“What? Meatloaf again?” the crowd jeered.
Meatloaf had always been our favourite, but now…
This was something we never expected.
“Just eat it,” Brad said quietly, so Frank wouldn’t hear him and be offended.
I nodded and picked up my fork. Pushing at the vile meat on my plate. Frank had been so gracious, taking us in after our car broke down, but yet, something seemed off. Maybe it was my attire.
But later, in the velvet darkness, of the blackest night…well, none of it made any sense. It must have all been a crazy dream.

Russ Josephs said...

When Tad arrived at our house for dinner, he was not alone. With him was Amanda. Amanda Bynes. You know, the actress? Think Lindsey Lohan, minus the alcoholism, drug addiction and lesbianism. This was something we never expected. But being gracious hosts, we welcomed them both with open arms.

“I brought pie,” said Amanda Bynes. “It’s lemon.”

“Thanks,” I said. “Can’t wait to try it after dinner.”

“After?” she said incredulously. “Us Hollywood types eat desert before dinner. Didn’t you know?”

“No, I didn’t,” I said. “But thanks for the tip.”

After that, we never invited Tad over again.

Weronika Janczuk said...

Tinkling laughter from the street spills into the apartment.

I run my fork through the browned tomatoes on my plate and glance across at Oreo, the lab, who eyes me carefully. "This was something we never expected, is it?" I ask him and grimace. When my divorce became official the weekend of Valentine's Day, I told myself I would never forgive Jim--and, boy, I haven't come close.

The doorbell sounds.

I walk towads the door. "Huh. Who could it be?"

Mark, from the office, stands in the hall, holding roses.

"Well, this was something we--er, I--never expected."


Grandpa Goose said...

After sitting down to a weekly Sunday dinner of roast beef, boiled potatoes, carrots and bean salad, our guest asked, “Do y’all have any hot sauce?’ While not surprised such a request would be made by someone from New Orleans, I worried that lacking this condiment may begin a boring conversation about the superiority of Southern cooking. After Mom apologized for no Tabasco sauce, our guest drew out a small bottle from his jacket pocket. “I’m always prepared,” he grinned, and putting the neck into his mouth, sucked at it for thirty seconds. This was something we never expected!

Stephanie Feldstein said...

“Rufus loves you…come to dinner!” An unruly Giant Schnauzer with an enormous pedigree, Rufus just graduated Sara’s training class. No doubt his owners would serve pates and sorbets, tenderloins and champagne. She accepted, needing a break from cheap takeout.

“This was something we never expected,” his owners fawned over Rufus’ polite greeting at the mansion’s door. The dog bounded ahead to the backyard and his house. Sara peered inside the dog-sized replica of the mansion. When she looked up, the owners were gone. A waiter approached with a silver bowl and a covered platter.

Maybe she’d still get tenderloin?

Shanni said...

Lilly and I were walking back from the theater. We had missed dinner and were famished. Deciding on a little Italian restaurant, we stepped through the threshold into the cozy atmosphere that drew us to this place. We sat down at table in the middle of the restaurant. Lilly picked up a menu. It looked very old and out of date. “Lightly breaded human brains, with a side of small intestines and raw human liver,” she read. A shudder of fear flew down our spines. Lilly and I looked up from the menu. “This was something we never expected.”

I am in a zombie mood again!